Breadth: Spanning the Spectrum is an intensely personal project, documenting the lives of those on the autistic spectrum. Being autistic myself, I am so fiercely passionate about this subject, and have long felt that the static perception of what it means to be autistic is often damaging to autistic people. It seems that in the mainstream media, autism is portrayed as extreme stereotypes, which has shaped a global perception of what autism looks like, but actually, autism manifests in an infinite number of ways. I have been completely astounded by the amount of people that have been brave enough to be part of this project, and I hope by taking all of your portraits and telling your stories, we really can make a difference to how the autistic spectrum is perceived. The dream is to eventually get this portrait project published into a coffee table book so that our portraits and stories can have as wider reach as possible and play a role in changing the current stigmatisations surrounding ASD. Directly below is my own story surrounding my autism (please click on each name to redirect to a page with larger images) - if you’re also autistic, and would like to be part of this project, I would be so honoured and delighted to take your portraits.
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As seen on…
Thank you so much for taking time to look at my project, here is my own story -
‘Hi, I’m Alex and I’m Autistic. I was late-diagnosed, like many girls and women, at the age of 16. As a teenager, I vowed to keep my diagnosis as a closely guarded secret, afraid of the compartmentalised reaction I would receive from my peers if I ever disclosed my autism. Since attending university, however, I made an amazing group of friends, and suddenly found myself with the courage to be open about my autism; I often found myself encountering remarks such as ‘you don’t seem autistic’, ‘i’d never have guessed’, ‘you don’t like like someone with autism’, but what does autism look like? What does autism act like? I think this notion was key in my late diagnosis - I didn’t fit the pervasive and often damaging stereotypes of the autism narrative perpetuated in the mainstream media; I’m not Rain Man, i’m not a savant with an incredible mathematic ability, nor am i someone that requires lifelong care or assistance - and the problem with the exclusivity of these stereotypes is that when we don’t fulfil them, nobody sees us. As a confused, ‘volatile’ kid, I fell through the vacuum of space between these opposing cliches, into an isolating space of invisibility, where the perpetual companionship of isolation as a confused teenager in a world built for the neurotypical mind, rendered me as one of the greatest social disappearing acts the universe had ever witnessed. The problem with isolation is that the closer and more familiar it becomes, the further away everything else seems, and when you’re treated as invisible for long enough, you also, start to lose sight of yourself. Contrary to popular belief, autism isn’t a linear scale from mildly autistic to very autistic, its more like a kaleidoscope of fluid colours. I'm often told that I must be ‘mildly autistic’ but in fact, this just means that the world experiences me as mild; the life I experience has never felt mild to me. Despite the struggles associated with being autistic, autistic people aren’t broken or defective, we don’t endure suffering because of our autism, we endure suffering from the way in which the world treats and receives our autism. The kaleidoscope constellation of my diagnosis is an intrinsic part of me, and although autism has undoubtedly come with its own struggles, it also has enabled me to possess a unique strength, passion and focus. I have the ability to dedicate myself passionately to a subject, and express a pure enthusiasm that I have only ever witnessed elsewhere in my autistic peers. I have been autistic my entire life, not just since my diagnosis at age 16, and as I think about the invisible girl I was, lost between the vacuum of savants and the neurotypical, I feel an intense desire to expand the minds of what people think it means to be autistic, and reveal the true breadth of the spectrum, so that one day, the gap into the invisible will be eliminated and the stigmatisations silenced. ‘Spanning the Spectrum’ will celebrate our diverse differences and strengths, and provide VISIBILITY to our (past, present and future) autistic peers.’
‘My name is Alex Manners, 24 and I’m an Asperger’s champion, public speaker, presenter and author. I was diagnosed with Asperger’s when I was 10 years old. As soon as I received my diagnosis my dad told me that I should not be worried about having Asperger’s as lots of our family have Asperger’s traits and that it gives me special powers. So, from then on, I have always viewed my Asperger’s as something positive and something that I feel extremely lucky to have been able to manage over the past 24 years. However, its not all been easy. There have been many challenges along the way and my time at school was very traumatic. Going to school used to feel like I was going to prison and it was a real struggle for my mum to get me in everyday. Meltdowns were frequent during my time at school and something that I still have today.
Football is my whole life and I think about football all of the time. It has given me another focus in life and has always been a way to allow me to de-stress. A few years ago I started my own “Autism & Football” campaign to enhance the match day experience for those with hidden disabilities. I can name every ground name in the top 5 tiers of English football, completed my quest to watch a match at all 92 English Football League clubs and filmed the home matches of my local club Solihull Moors for 2 seasons for BT Sport.
I now present talks all about “My Life Living with Asperger’s” to lots of different companies, law firms, universities and colleges all over the world. I have also written and published a book called “That’s Not Right! My Life Living with Asperger’s”, presented my own children’s radio show for 2 years and appeared on series 10 and 11 of ‘The Undateables’ on Channel 4. There are many positive elements of my Asperger’s. For example, I can stand up and speak in front of large numbers of people without any worries. This is just one of my ‘Asperger’s Superpowers’ and because I will have Asperger’s for the rest of my life, then these superpowers are the things I like to focus on every day. To me life is an adventure and I want to spend it “pursuing my passions”. That’s why I will never give up until my ambitions are achieved.
Remember that everyone with Asperger’s is unique and needs to be treated as an individual and with empathy. Whatever your circumstances are never let them define you. If you are prepared to put the hard work in and have determination, then I believe you can achieve anything you want.’ - Alex
Meeting Eve was a pretty emotional experience for me; it’s hard to describe what it’s like to meet other autistic women that I relate to on such an intrinsic level. Growing up as a late diagnosed autistic girl can feel so isolating, because I didn’t know anyone else ‘like me’. Eve is a talented musician; the first time I heard her music there was this feeling of innate familiarity, like I related to it on such a fundamental level. To be around someone that not only truly understands, but actually experiences the same things I do is such a freeing feeling; I’m so used to explaining away the way I do things or the why I do things, it feels like a huge weight is lifted to just exist around someone authentically without a why even for just a short while! You can find Eve’s music here - www.eveowenmusic.com/music
‘For me, autism is feeling everything very close up all the time. Everything’s volume is high and constant, sensorially & emotionally. It feels isolating sometimes, like the world is too loud to interact with. Most days I find myself purposefully dulling down the things around me so they don’t overwhelm me.
It’s sad that’s something I feel I need to do. Surely it’s a good thing to experience life intensely, but it just makes me disorientated and existential. I feel things up close, but feel far away from people.
It’s important people understand that autism is a spectrum. Just because we can sometimes appear neurotypical, doesn’t mean we’re coping that way. We mask because it makes you more comfortable, not us. If anything, that just shows how far we’ve got to go in making sure autistic people feel accepted into society.’ - Eve
I met Ben as a colleague, as we were both working on some police Cyber Security training events. I learnt so much from him, and we quickly became great friends. Ben inspires me so much, and has overcome more in his life than most. He is so successful in his career, and has such a positive impact on everyone that gets to meet him.
‘My name is Ben, I am 23, working in cyber security and I was diagnosed as autistic in June 2020 as I finished uni.
Looking back, its obvious to me now how much I masked my autistic traits throughout my life. My family came here as refugees from Rwanda and the genocide and the complexities thereafter shadowed much of my childhood and life, it wasn’t spoken about often, but it was always there in the undercurrent of the stories people would tell me of home. With all that for my family to deal with, masking was common. It is part of the culture to some extent, it informed how we engage with the world; it was our protection.
There is great power I think in being able to give language to an experience, and that’s what my diagnosis did for me. It was the answer to a lifetime of questions I always had, but couldn’t articulate why university was so hard even though I have always done fine academically, why family gatherings were so draining, and this lingering feeling I’ve had of always feeling different. I felt like I finally had permission to fully be myself, and it definitely was no easy road. I eventually chose to go private after being rejected by the GP, eventually accessing services through cognitive behavioural therapy at the time, then covid hit, lockdown came and after paying over 800 pounds I got it.
If there is one thing I am slowly learning since my diagnosis, its to enjoy the journey I am on. I thankfully managed to land a career in one of my many special interests and its been an amazing journey overall, as I learn to unmask and grow more confident in myself. I still struggle and have bad days, but I am so much further forward and I know I have a lot to look forward too and a lot to discover.
Until I got diagnosed, autism and neurodiversity wasn’t even considered in my culture and I definitely didn’t fit conventional views of what autism looked like. Now, there is growing awareness of the different ways autism manifests, and how diverse the autism spectrum really is; my experiences give me a unique perspective and its something I take pride in and I can only hope to continue learning from others, and they can learn from me.’
I had such a fantastic time meeting and talking to David; he is a lecturer at my University, where I completed both my BA and MA. David received his autism diagnosis at age 60, and has accomplished so much throughout life from a successful military career, owning multiple business, winning awards and he is a published author; his story is nothing short of inspiring.
‘I am a late diagnosed autistic person, having been formally assessed in my 60th year. I had approached my local doctor for advice on assessment for Autism Spectrum Condition (ASC), only to be challenged with “why bother, at your age?” I could not answer at the time. However, I felt I would get little help from the NHS. However, although I could not answer the question then, I felt I could not let the issue drop. I went private and was assessed as autistic in 2019.
In 60 years, I knew something was not quite right in my world. Or rather, my world and the world many others seemed to occupy appeared, on many occasions, to be out of alignment. At times, this misalignment has not mattered. At times it has been a strength—allowing me to achieve a great many things: I am still the only person I know who completed a PhD in three years’ part-time study, winning two awards for research excellence and publishing my findings as an academic monograph, while at the same time running one of my businesses, employing staff and paying taxes. At other times, this misalignment has been a weakness—preventing me from achieving my potential.
Does it matter that, past the age of 60, I now understand that the misalignment I have experienced, and continue to do so, is autism? Well, yes. It does. The misalignment is not just mine; it is other’s as well. It tells me, for example, that my career trajectory as an Officer in the Royal Air Force could have been so much more, had both sides been aware that ASC was a “thing” even in the days, weeks, months and years that followed the collapse of the Berlin Wall, and the demise of the Cold War. Having had several special recommendations for promotion downgraded by my seniors, not because of poor performance, but because, in the words of one senior officer: “…there are aspects of [my] personality which [he found] uncomfortable”. My personality aside, I had demonstrated, at a young age (30), that I had been capable enough to manage a team of software engineers responsible for supporting the UK’s Military Satellite Communication System. What else could I have done there?
If my autism has held me back, it has also driven me forward. I have been an entrepreneur, founding award-winning businesses, and I have been given the opportunity to teach in Higher Education. This is despite a profound inability to interview well. In forty years, I have failed to successfully ‘pass’ the face-to-face interview for any job I have applied for, including the position of lecturer I now hold. Yet, I look back on a lifetime of achievements, a proud dad, grandfather and husband. And, with more projects on the go, I look forward with an autistic’s profound interest in the study of the future—to an inclusive, more equitable socio-economic future, one better suited to a more diverse population. A more aligned future.’ - David
I first met Simon on a police training course run by Creased Puddle where we were both delivering associate work to help police achieve best evidence, and safeguard neurodivergent witnesses, suspects and victims. It was so inspirational for me to hear about Simon’s extremely successful career in the police, which in many ways was achieved because of the detail-orientated positive autistic traits, not in spite of being autistic. I think this is always a very common misconception when celebrating autistic achievements; achievements are largely because of the infinitely positive autistic traits, as opposed to conquering these traits.
Simon achieved the high rank of Detective Super Intendant, and was head of a large major crime unit. You can watch Simon’s work as SIO on a case in a Channel 4 Documentary here - ‘Catching a Killer: The Search for Natalie Hemming’
‘Hi, my name is Simon Steel, I am married and have 4 children. I was recently diagnosed as autistic in my fifties following what is becoming an ever-increasing, familiar route of parent seeking an assessment having gone through the process with one of their children. I have enjoyed a successful career in policing, reaching the rank of Detective Superintendent, and was the head of a large major crime unit, leading many homicide investigations. My attention to detail was clearly a strength in that field. I fulfilled many detective roles, spending time in the regional organised crime team, working within the cyber-crime team, along with working in the counter corruption unit. I also developed the forces policies, particularly in protecting vulnerable people. I am now an independent safeguarding chair and author , I also work in the voluntary sector for an autism charity. I am passionate about sport, and I am the chairman of a rugby league club.’
I met Steph at the beginning of this year, and getting to know her has been nothing short of life changing. It’s always such a surreal and validating feeling for me to meet other autistic women, because our experiences are barley ever highlighted. Steph has been through some of the most unimaginable trauma, but throughout has remained kind and selfless, which, I think, is one of the rarest things in the entire world. Steph now works as a neurodiversity consultant, educating companies across the country on the nuances of neurodiversity, and the strengths neurodiverse brains bring to workforces. She also works tirelessly in advocating for victims of domestic violence, and speaks regularly as a survivor of domestic abuse. More of Steph’s incredible story to follow over the next few days.
‘My name is Stephanie Brodie, I’m 47 years old. Having been late diagnosed in 2018, after battling the system for 4 years to get referred for an ASD (autism spectrum disorder) diagnosis, has meant I’ve had to relearn who I am. In my late 20’s, I bought my 1st house, had a successful career and partner, but I was unable to maintain a work, life balance. I ended up losing everything, and subsequently got involved with the wrong people and communities. Even then, I still didn’t fit in. I was initially wrongly diagnosed, and sent to The Maudsley Hospital for an ADHD diagnosis, so the consultant could ‘prove me wrong’, as he didn’t believe I was ADHD diagnosis, only to prove the consultant wrong with a diagnosis of severe combination ADHD.
I have always been constantly misunderstood, even to the point that I was nearly sectioned under the mental health act. I was forced to go to CBT sessions, and was ‘taught’ coping mechanisms that just didn’t work, and left me in a state of being more confused and with a feeling of being inadequate/ inferior.
Unfortunately throughout my life, I’ve experienced some extremely traumatic situations, that thankfully most people will never experience. People always tell me how inspiring I am, and that despite all of the things I’ve been through in my life, I’ve still come out of the other end stronger than ever. However, I don’t see that, I just see how much I have had taken away from me. I’ll never have the opportunity to be a mother or a grandma. I don’t have the stability of marriage, a secure career or a committed relationship. Reflecting back, I see that throughout my life, I’ve always been perceived as the problem. I’ve not paid attention enough and have always been regarded as rebellious because I don’t fit into the typically socially accepted perception of what, and how, a woman should be. I’m often accused of being aggressive when, in fact, I’m assertive, or due to trauma, anxious. I have had to be assertive to survive.
For 17 years, I was consistently told I’d never be able to work again or hold down a job. I never stayed idle during those years - I set up a number of community projects and finished my degree. Life has been very much like learning to drive. You 1st learn to pass your driving test, once you get your licence, you then learn how to actually drive on the road.
Coming to terms with what should have been and how difficult it's been, has been a difficult journey, which I continue to travel on. Since my diagnosis, I’ve been slowly taking off my many different masks, that I have had to use to fit into today’s society, which is not easy, especially with the world being so judgemental and fixed in the idea of how women should be.
Being ADHD, autistic, dyslexic and PTSD, I experience additional conflicts. They often work against each other, never mind our hormones, which have a huge impact on the combination of neuodiversity. I’ve found I have a strong sense of injustice and love for law, especially as it has hard facts.
I want nothing that I have gone through to go to waste. I want to thrive. We all deserve that. My desire is to continue to champion women within neurodiversity and talk about my experiences in domestic abuse, along with the criminal and civil system. I will continue to speak at public events, tell my story and empower others.
Please don’t judge a book by its cover.’
I had the privilege of meeting renowned artist, James Owen Thomas a couple of months ago at his ‘From Waste to Wall’ Horticap exhibition. James’s work centres around the ‘environment and single use products as he turns things discarded by others into a medium for expression’. James mainly works with scratch cards, however he also occassinsaly works with other discarded materials such as old tickets, leaflets, product packaging and fabrics that can be recycled into commissioned art pieces. James’s environmental art is all made from recycled items, from the ‘canvases he buys second-hand to the materials he uses to collage onto the canvases. The sorting, tearing, cutting and hole-punching of scratch cards provides the colour palette with the aim to ‘inspire people to re-use and recycle, then hopefully we look forward to a more environmentally-friendly future.’ James is an ambassador for the Tree Council, London, where he was nominated as a One Step Greener ambassador; on 28th October 2021 James attended 10 Downing Street for a COP26 Cultural Showcase. In December 2021, James’s artwork sold for £20,000 at the Caudwell Children’s Butterfly Ball in London, raising money for services, support and funding for disabled children and their families. James’s Owen Thomas is both an inspirational artist and advocate, and it was such a privilege to meet him.
‘I used to have special interests in collecting things and keeping them safe in scrapbooks as a visual way of learning. I liked having leaflets from places that I had visited, as well as train and bus tickets as a memory of travelling there. In fact, I was able to remember bus routes and bus numbers from an early age. I could even compare the engine sounds. I always liked travelling to places on public transport, and on my 9th birthday, I was treated to a tour of a bus depot.
From the age of about 14, I noticed the number of scratch cards littering the streets in cities and towns. For something most people would consider rubbish, I decided to pick up the discarded scratch cards, clean them and keep them safe in plastic containers sorted by colours. It wasn’t long until I discovered how good they looked when torn and then put beck together in a mosaic-style to make different designs. I did not need to add paint to them in my artwork as they were already brightly coloured and I was attracted to them because of their vibrant patterns and shining colours. My autism gave me this gift, but I wouldn’t say that it has been an easy time for me since my diagnosis aged 3.5 years old. I had communication difficulties and the usual sensory overload problems that I understand affect so many with autism. I struggled to fit in at school and college but I always say that you have to be strong to be different, and the way I keep myself strong is through my art.’
You can view James Owen Thomas’s beautiful work on his website here: www.jamesowenthomas.com
Thomas
‘My happy place is anywhere with my sister because we make each other laugh'.’ - Thomas
Hendrix
I really enjoyed photographing and meeting Hendrix; I related to many of his experiences, especially regarding school so much. He is super kind and is also interested in photography, which I could definitely talk about all day! He even let me have a go on his electric scooter!
‘going on the swing makes me feel happy’ - Hendrix
Munro was diagnosed after his eldest son. Since his diagnosis he has felt so free and has thrived. He is a sound engineer, and worked for Radio Womad & Bristol Community Radio before setting up his own radio station ‘Lanternman Radio’. He specialises in world music, and has recorded hundreds of live sessions with world artists ranging from Australian ska bands to Mongolian throat singers. He runs a very popular weekly quiz in a Yorkshire pub, and an online weekly quiz on Sundays, plus an all request show on Tuesdays. He is a keen cricketer, captains the team and plays football. Munro’s most passionate activity is being a loving Dad; he is very open about being autistic and aims to break down the stigma and stereotypes of an autistic male, dad, partner and friend.
‘Being diagnosed autistic at age 46 was like having a thick veil of confusion lifted from me.’ - Munro
Poppy, aged 8, absolutely loves her jelly Cat Bunnies and has over 15, which she lovingly cares for - each bunny has a name and back story. One of her favourite things to do is to lie in bed surrounded by all her bunnies; I was so excited to meet them as she introduced me to every single one. She’s incredibly sweet, caring, loving and one of the funniest people I have ever met. Poppy’s emotional intuition really struck me, I am often quite anxious and shy when I meet people for the first time, but she did everything she could to put me at ease, and it really felt like I was hanging out with someone I had known for years. Poppy’s brother, Oliver, is also autistic, and when he becomes overwhelmed or distressed Poppy reaches out and soothes him. It is simply not true that autistic people lack emotional integrity, as shown by Poppy, autistic people can be some of the most emotionally insightful and intuitive people you will ever meet. She also loves reading and being in nature, particularly swimming in the local river and running around Brimham rocks. I had such a fun time photographing Poppy, and she does the best Jim impression from Friday night dinner I have ever heard! Poppy is the daughter of Munro, who featured in the previous post.
‘ I like my bunny’s they are called -
Odin
Midnight
Wikit
Chewy
Daisy
Hopety
Augustus
Milly
Cinnamon
Roly
Socky
Alexandra
Big Chewy
Snowball
Lollypop
They make me feel happy’ - Poppy, aged 6.
Oliver, aged 12, loves drawing comics, running, building lego and collecting sticks to make into bespoke walking sticks. I had such a fantastic time at Brimham Rocks, North Yorkshire with Oliver and his family, he’s a super climber and he showed me his walking stick that he collected a long time ago, which was really interesting to see. Oliver is Poppy’s older brother and Munro’s son.
'I am most happy when I’m with my stick’ - Oliver Goldfield, aged 12.
I had such an amazing time photographing the Goldfield family, they are so kind, funny and welcoming. I think this family is a perfect example of how a blend of neurotypical and autistic people in a family work, and thrive together. Dad - Munro, Poppy and Oliver, who have featured in this project are autistic, whereas Mum - Deborah and siblings Rosie and Wilf, are neurotypical. Deborah is the heart and centre of the family, and they all love outdoor activities together. As well as being a fantastic mum, Deborah is also an emergency medicine doctor! Thank you so much to the Goldfields for inviting me in to their family and making me feel so welcome.
‘There is never, ever a dull moment in a family with a mix of autistic and neurotypical adults and children. With a great deal of love, understanding, patience and knowledge, a mixed family and relationship can thrive and be extremely loving. My happy place is being outside with my children in the weeds or wild swimming - Deborah Goldfield, mother of 4, partner of late diagnosis autistic, best friend and emergency medicine doctor’.
I had such an amazing time meeting and photographing Regan, and it was an experience I’m sure I won’t ever forget. It was one of the first times in my life that I have met someone that has had such similar experiences to myself in terms of school and inner anxieties surrounding ASD. During the shoot, I managed to actually snap two rolls of 35mm film (something that very rarely happens in film photography, let alone twice in one day!). Usually this is something that would totally throw me off and I would probably be written off for the rest of the day, but the fact that Regan really empathised with how I was feeling and understood entirely, felt both freeing and validating, and meant that I was able to overcome the unexpected difficulty and carry on with no problems. Regan studied mathematics at the University of Sheffield, and after gaining his degree, has gone on to become a data analyst for a gas company.
Regan’s insight into his own experience of ASD is something I think many others will strongly relate to -
“In the past at school and uni I had sort-of managed to get away with keeping my autism diagnosis to myself as I was able to just go to my room or somewhere and get on with my work, I could focus on that. Since I graduated from uni nearly a couple of years ago and entered the world of work that started to become a lot harder and certainly more recently. I have always been aware of my own difficulties, particularly from about year 10 at secondary school. I am a very shy person and have tried hard (by changing schools to do my A-levels for a fresh start), probably too hard, to change it so I was like ‘everyone else’, and could experience what they were. I was conscious of the impression I gave people and how people would react to whatever I might say, and whether it was ‘right’ or not. I replayed past conversations to see where I could do ‘better’. I tried to be friends with whoever I met regardless of their actual impression on me. It was awkward I have to say, though I did finally meet some nice people which made Y13 a relatively good year – however the anxiety about trying to be ‘correct’ in what I said was always there. I never actually spoke that much. That lasted through uni as well, I hated the idea of going out and drinking and did come under pressure to do it – I did awkwardly attempt that lifestyle very briefly a bit later on but I wouldn’t want to relive that ever again! I have always preferred one to one conversations, as soon as it was a group of more than 2 people, that’s where it becomes more difficult when socialising. Having a bit of a hearing impairment (high pitches like fire alarms) has always made things tougher for me too. My confidence has been affected throughout, it does not take much to lose what I have gained.
My autism has definitely benefitted me academically as well, certainly on the mathematical side of things – but I generally wasn’t very good at English at school, especially Literature. Sport and PE certainly was an absolute nightmare for me – I was the worst pretty much at every sport throughout school like football, rugby, tennis, swimming and so on mainly because I can never get my coordination right, and running was the only thing I could do and not come last! I would have looked really silly at times but for some reason it never bothered me that much (I tried as hard as I could!), compared to the social side.
I have managed to improve my social skills a lot generally but I still have these moments and will probably do so for the rest of my life as it is who I am. I still hold myself back from people so much of the time. I realise now that it is better to be just myself. There is such a wide range of people like us, with such a wide range of different characteristics. I have met some other autistic people and they are all very different to me and each other in many ways. Our characteristics make us who we are as people, and that is in a positive way, in that I would not be me without my defining characteristics and changing any part of myself to fit any particular ‘convention’ around me is not what I should do nor should anyone else – we should be able to just be ourselves regardless. I have never before reflected on my life so far as deeply as I have here.” - Regan
I really enjoyed meeting Mabz for the day in Barnsley, we clicked instantly and immediately formed a friendship. The stereotype that autistic individuals lack emotional intuition and bypass expressive subtleties could not be further from the truth; after our shoot, we went to get something to eat, and whilst we were waiting for our food, I became very overwhelmed by the intense noise and loud voices in the shop, and without me saying anything, Mabz immediately noticed and made sure I was okay, whilst reassuring me to calm me down. Mabz is extremely empathetic and has a very calming influence on others, which is vital in their career as a residential support worker for the National Autistic Society - which is truly amazing, as they are able to empathise and understand residents on a deep and authentic level. Mabz received their autism diagnosis at the age of 18, and studied Creative Media - Film and TV, going on to work on short films and documentaries whilst also working as an actor - they particularly enjoy voice acting. Aside from their role as a support worker for NAS, Mabz is an accomplished model, having been published by numerous magazine organisations. Mabz is comfortable and confident with expressing their gender identity, and modelling has played a strong role in helping them to achieve this.
‘Being autistic is a part of who I am. It has helped to shape the person I am today. I am not perfect, but I am happy with the person I am today. I may be flawed, but at least I try.’ - Mabz
As soon as I met Rae, we instantly clicked. She is without a doubt, one of the most inspiring people I have ever met; not only has she overcome, but has thrived in the face of such adversity. Rae was diagnosed as autistic at 17, and now (aged 30) works as a chef at the world renowned Betty’s Tea Rooms in Harrogate, North Yorkshire. She married her wife 2 years ago, after forming their relationship as teenagers at age 16. Both Rae and her wife are approved foster carers, and have now decided to start their own family through IVF treatment. As a child, like many female autistics, Rae was incorrectly diagnosed as ADHD at age 7 and then bipolar at 15, which only leads to misunderstanding within educational systems. Rae’s father was a very well regarded police officer in Harrogate, however when she was 15 years old, he was tragically killed whilst on duty. Despite this tragedy at such a young age, along with her misdiagnosis’s, Rae is an extremely bubbly, hilarious and empathetic person, and above all else, she is selflessly kind. I am so honoured that myself and Rae have formed a close friendship, of which I’m sure will last a lifetime.
‘Is this me of how you see me? WEIRD, CRAZY, PSYCHO, STRANGE. The words people described me as everyday. I knew I was different, I knew I didn’t fit in. ADHD, DEPRESSION, BIPOLAR DISORDER - the things I was diagnosed with at first. AUTISM, AUTISTIC, DIVERSE - the moments I started understanding myself… FEAR, HATRED, ANXIETY - the things I live with everyday. But really… I’m just Rae, just because you see and hear my lively loud sound, does not mean it’s a happy sound. Just because I love children’s thing like lego and dinosaurs does not make me me a child. Don’t define me by my autism but also don’t assume I’m coping with this world.’ - Rae
I had such a lovely time meeting Sebastian and his family. He is such a kind boy, and put me at ease straight away as I can sometimes be a little nervous meeting new people. I am so pleased with the pictures from my time with Sebastian, the first image actually ended up being published by Vogue Italia. Throughout my time hanging out with Sebastian, he made me laugh so much my face hurt, we definitely share the same sense of humour! Sebastian, aged 10, lives with his mummy and daddy and little sister Darcey, and his little dog Nala!
‘Sebastian is your typical 10 year old boy - he loves gaming and being on his iPad. He also loves anything Harry Potter! Sebastian was born 9 weeks premature and has mild cerebral palsy. We first noticed something was wrong aged 9 months, when he was unable to sit up. He was diagnosed with cerebral palsy at about 18 months old. He didn’t meet the usual milestones and was unable to walk. He had various equipment growing up, such as sitting frames, standing frames, a walker and splints. At age 4 we tried Botox injections and serial casting (like when you’ve broken your leg, only these get changed every week, and stretch your legs in place a little more each time). When Sebastian turned 4, we found out about SDR (selective dorsal rhizotomy). We travelled to St Louis (America) for five weeks where Sebastian underwent spinal surgery and had his heel cords lengthened. It was after this point that Sebastian took his first proper unaided steps! Along with his sister (who at the time, aged 19 months still wasn’t walking up until now). SDR changed Sebastian’s and our lives. He was now able to walk but needed supportive splints, night splints, gators and a wheelchair for distances. We thought that everything would be fine here on in and then he started school! Again, Sebastian didn’t meet the milestones and struggled to adapt to being in a school environment. There would be incidents most days and I would get called in. I was told he was just naughty. He was even excluded from school for a week. This was the hardest time we’ve ever been through as a family. After two years of being at the school we got no help and nothing changed. When things came to a head and I thought I might actually have a breakdown, we decided to look at alternative settings. We found a place for Sebastian at a new school (mainstream still) and it was the best move we’ve ever made. Sebastian has literally thrived. He got the exact help he needed and was diagnosed with Autism. It was an absolute relief. We always knew there was something and Sebastian always felt he was different. Having the diagnosis has been such a relief and it’s made a huge difference to Sebastian. Sebastian today loves school and is thriving. Yes he might be a little quirky, he has certain ways about him that can be frustrating, but he’s the kindest, sweetest most loving little man; he is incredibly articulate, outgoing and inquisitive and we think he’s just perfect.’ - Selina, Sebastian’s mum.
I really enjoyed taking Charlie’s portraits! I was pretty nervous as it was my first time using my new camera, but as Charlie is also very much into photography, he made me feel really at ease whilst I spent time adjusting the settings. Charlie, 21, was diagnosed as autistic aged 12, and studied both Graphic Design and Creative Media at York College, he is super talented and recently created a fantastic short factual project on ‘Wetherby Christmas lights during the challenging year of 2020’, which can be watched here - www.youtube.com/watch?v=PATsKB8Z2s4. Charlie’s amazing portfolio can be viewed on his website - https://yerodavison.wixsite.com/davisons.../productionskills
‘𝘈𝘭𝘮𝘰𝘴𝘵 10 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘦𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢 𝘥𝘪𝘢𝘨𝘯𝘰𝘴𝘪𝘴, 𝘐 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘶𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘶𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘵. 𝘐’𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘳𝘺 𝘲𝘶𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘮𝘺 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘯 𝘦𝘧𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘢𝘴 ‘𝘯𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘢𝘭’ 𝘢𝘴 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦. 𝘋𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘯𝘶𝘮𝘦𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘢𝘸𝘬𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵 𝘤𝘪𝘳𝘤𝘶𝘮𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘦, 𝘐 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘶𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘮 𝘰𝘧𝘧 𝘮𝘺 𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘳𝘥, 𝘢𝘴 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘭𝘢𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘴 𝘢 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘢𝘣𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺 - 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘐 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘨𝘨𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘧𝘺 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘢𝘴. 𝘔𝘺 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘧𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘐 𝘢𝘮, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘨𝘢𝘳𝘥𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘐 𝘵𝘳𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘣𝘦 𝘰𝘣𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘤𝘭𝘦𝘴. 𝘌𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺, 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘧𝘶𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘦𝘯𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘯𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘨𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘢 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘧𝘶𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥’ - Charlie
Photographing Matthew was really special for me, as he is one of my best friends. Me and Matthew first met in York 5 years ago, we were both pretty shy and apprehensive at the time, but throughout the years we both grew in confidence and supported each other immensely throughout our time at university. It was so important for me to have a friend that understood my anxieties, and although me and Matthew are very different in so many ways, we both have a fundamental understanding of each other that is not so easily shared with neurotypicals. Matthew is hilarious without even trying to be, and would make me laugh until my stomach hurt even in my worst times of anxiety. We have had some hilarious nights out and parties together with our friends, and share some amazing and precious university memories. I made a friend for life in Matthew, and we are both always there for each other, no matter where we are in the world.
‘My name is Matthew Skidmore. I am 23 years old. I am a graduate of Religion, Philosophy and Ethics at York St. John University, graduating with a 2:1 in 2019. I was diagnosed with autism at 3 years old and was non-verbal until I was 6. This therefore made communication with other people difficult as I didn’t know how to speak or how to communicate properly. However, I was able to attend mainstream education and managed decent grades throughout my time at school, so it’s safe to say I didn’t struggle academically. Being diagnosed early helped for various measures to be put in place to help me with my studies.
I also struggle with anxiety issues, mainly regarding trying new things even if it is something trivial like food. I always worry that people would never understand me, something that I think goes back to when I was in school. However, my time at university has helped me to overcome these anxiety issues while also reducing the number of meltdowns that I’ve had. I’ve learned to let my feelings out privately and have developed coping strategies through talking with wellbeing that I still use to this day and has been a massive help to me in the pandemic where any form of certainty seems to have been eradicated. I haven’t punched myself in the head since shortly after turning 21 so I guess that’s a positive.
I am now currently studying a master’s course in Special Educational Needs and Inclusion at York St. John University (though all teaching has been online so far) and am hoping to eventually get myself into a position where I can help children and young adults on the autism spectrum achieve their full potential when going through the educational system. My eventual goal is to work in the council, helping with the policies that go into the local offer and provisions for children in schools. I feel like it would be nice if someone with real world experience of the measures put in place by schools was in this position as I feel it will help reduce the stigma that people on the autism spectrum are unemployable. After all, I believe that people who are autistic are the best people to give guidance on how provisions should be laid out and what services to prioritise.
As for outside interests, I enjoy playing video games and listening to music as it helps me to relax, and certainly has helped keep me sane during the last year. I also enjoy spending time with the family, playing board games and watching films from time to time. I also used to enjoy going out for walks but anxiety surrounding the pandemic has put pay to that somewhat, first at the start of the pandemic when I only left the house once in April and then again in November 2020 when I caught Covid 19. However, I am slowly trying to pick myself up and go out for some walks again soon. My hope is to eventually build up the confidence to go outdoors again on a more regular basis, maybe doing a walk twice a week around my local area.’ - Matthew
I’m sure many of you will already know Rory, so I don’t need to give much of an introduction! I was so excited for this shoot, because Rory’s accomplishments inspire me to work hard everyday in making this project a success, and he is testament to the fact that the perceived limitations of autistic people are entirely false. I had such a fantastic time taking pictures of Rory and meeting his lovely mum, he showed me his two amazing studios, played me a track and showed me a small selection of pictures of him with his celebrity friends! Rory has done so much for the autistic community, and still remains super humble despite his success. The best thing about this project is most definitely the amazing friends I have made, and I’m so happy to call Rory a friend of mine! Rory has just released a new disco track ‘Red Jacket’, which can be downloaded here. He also has a new book coming out in august called ‘The Beatles Acting Naturally (Rare, Unfinished and Abandoned Film and TV Project of the Fab Four)’. If you want to check out some of Rory’s fantastic and inspiring achievements you can follow him on facebook or view his website.
‘It was great seeing Alex and having a photoshoot! She asked me to write a little about myself - in fact, I could write about anything! As I know more about me, here goes, and I hope I don’t sound like I’m bragging too much!
I am actually a multi-award winning music producer/DJ, author and film maker! I have released seven albums on various worldwide labels and hundreds of singles, EPs, remixes and collaborations, and I love creating music.
In 2018, I wrote the guide to the late 1990’s dance music movement, big beat (I’m a big fan and my early roots were definitely with this type of music), with The Little Big Beat Book, published by New Haven Publishing, to critical and commercial acclaim, where I interviewed 120 artists from the time, including Fatboy Slim and The Prodigy - in fact I may have been one of the last people to interview Keith Flint before he sadly passed away. A Bookazine edition called The Story of Big Beat followed a year later. I have another new book coming out in August called ‘The Beatles Acting Naturally (Rare, Unfinished and Abandoned Film and TV Project of the Fab Four)’. The book is also published by New Haven.
I have DJ-ed at many major festivals in the UK and this is really my passion. I love being on stage in front of a big crowd, and I use the stage to it’s full advantage! I’ve supported Craig Charles on his Funk & Soul tours and Craig plays my tracks regularly on his BBC6 Funk & Soul Show. I’ve been on British and American TV, Radio and Press a number of times and have seen praise from artists such as Paul McCartney, Fatboy Slim, Craig Charles and others.
My tracks have been used as syncs for the likes of Disney, Google, Sony BET TV, ITV, Costco, Buzzfeed Yellow, Google, FOX TV and Audi.
My earlier years were taken up with film making, and my film ‘Autism & Me’ was published as a DVD and booklet through Jessica Kingsley Publishers. It was though this that I suddenly appeared on British and American TV, and I spent a couple of years going to schools and organisations where they showed my film and I did a Q&A session afterwards. I still get e-mails from all over the world from families who have seen my film - in fact one American mum said she felt she knew her son for the first time having watched my film, which is pretty awesome!
I was the winner of the Yorkshire Young Achiever of the Year Award, hosted by ITV, in the Arts category, which I won alongside actor Mikey North from Coronation Street. I won a Film 4 Youth Award, presented by film director Guy Ritchie. I was nominated for a Royal Television Society Award, have a UNICEF Award, 4Front Award and Wavemakers Award among others. I’m youth patron and ambassador for a number of charities, and was invited to be a Royal Commonwealth Associate Fellow.
Everyone is special, everyone is different, and everyone has something to offer the world!’ - Rory
I had a great time with Charlie Ryan! He is an accomplished actor, and is currently studying at Northampton University. I was so interested to learn that Charlie Ryan is a triplet, and he shares a close relationship with his siblings. The stereotype that autistic people lack imaginative skills and thus find careers in entertainment impossible is totally false - as evidenced by Charlie Ryan’s achievements!
'𝘐 𝘸𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘚𝘵 𝘈𝘪𝘥𝘢𝘯𝘴 𝘩𝘪𝘨𝘩 𝘴𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘭 𝘪𝘯 𝘏𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘰𝘨𝘢𝘵𝘦, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘵 3 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘢𝘵 𝘠𝘰𝘳𝘬 𝘤𝘰𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘨𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘥𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘋𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦, 𝘐 𝘱𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘓𝘈𝘔𝘋𝘈 𝘦𝘹𝘢𝘮 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘢𝘯 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘤𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘴 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘚𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘢𝘤𝘩. 𝘐 𝘢𝘭𝘴𝘰 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘵 3 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘥𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘢𝘵 𝘠𝘈𝘍𝘛𝘈. 𝘕𝘰𝘸, I 𝘢𝘮 𝘤𝘶𝘳𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘭𝘺 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘥𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘦𝘷𝘪𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘢𝘵 𝘕𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘮𝘱𝘵𝘰𝘯 𝘜𝘯𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘺.
𝘐 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘤 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴 8 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘰𝘭𝘥, 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘰𝘳 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘴𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘭𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘵 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘸, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘪𝘵 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘣𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘥, 𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘵 𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘫𝘶𝘥𝘨𝘦 𝘮𝘦. 𝘐 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘪𝘨𝘩 𝘴𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘭; 𝘮𝘺 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘥𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘵 𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘴𝘢𝘸 𝘢𝘯 𝘰𝘱𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘶𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘳𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘶𝘵 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘰𝘳 𝘥𝘰 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘪𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘨𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘳𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘐 𝘧𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘮. 𝘐 𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐’𝘮 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘤, 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘶𝘭𝘭𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘐 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘥. 𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘶𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘰𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘪𝘭𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘢𝘴 𝘐 𝘱𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘶𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘐 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘮 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘢 𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘺 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬. 𝘐 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯 𝘢𝘣𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘤𝘬 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘺 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘦. 𝘈𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘴 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘨𝘰 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘺 𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 𝘴𝘰 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘬, 𝘢𝘴 𝘐 𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘣𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘢 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘧𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳.
𝘛𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘭, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘰𝘳 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘮 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘦 𝘦𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘶𝘯𝘯𝘺 𝘰𝘳 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘥. 𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘐 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘢𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘢𝘤𝘤𝘦𝘱𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘦, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘶𝘭𝘭𝘺. 𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯’𝘵 𝘯𝘪𝘤𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘭, 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘤𝘬 𝘮𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘧𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘢 𝘥𝘢𝘮𝘯 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘮 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘶𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘰 𝘧𝘢𝘳.' - Charlie Ryan
I am so excited to share this shoot with Emily: Autism and Me. Emily is a 28 year old, recently diagnosed autistic woman. She has a degree in Primary Education and qualified as a teacher in 2015, and has since delivered educational workshops to children of all ages.
Emily now dedicates her time to helping others gain a greater understanding of autism to make the world a more accepting, supportive place for autistic people through her business ‘Emily: autism and me’. She offers autism awareness training sessions sessions, autism friendly training, peer support and public speaking. Her experiences of growing up in mainstream education as an undiagnosed female resonates with my own experiences, and so many other women I know. Emily is a hugely tenacious and kind person, and her work is vital in creating a more accepting future for autistic people. Visit Emily’s website at - www.emilyautism.co.uk
'𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘌𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 28 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘰𝘭𝘥. 𝘐𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘮 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦 𝘢 𝘧𝘦𝘸 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘢𝘨𝘰, 𝘐 𝘤𝘦𝘳𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯’𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘧𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘤 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧. 𝘖𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴, 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘴𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘪𝘯𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘮 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘣𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘯𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘮𝘦. 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘥 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘦𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘺 𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘮 𝘥𝘪𝘢𝘨𝘯𝘰𝘴𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘕𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳 2020. 𝘈𝘯𝘯𝘰𝘺𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘯𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘸, 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘵𝘩 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘮 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘐 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦.
𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘤 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘮 𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘰𝘵𝘺𝘱𝘦𝘴. 𝘍𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘦, 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘮 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘴𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘰𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵. 𝘎𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘭 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘵𝘩 𝘴𝘺𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘮 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺 𝘴𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘧𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘴 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘮𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘨𝘨𝘭𝘦𝘴 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘴𝘦.
𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘢𝘨𝘯𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘤 𝘧𝘦𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘣𝘺 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘶𝘱, 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘣𝘦𝘨𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘷𝘦𝘴.' - Emily
I really enjoyed hanging out with Amie, like many autistic women, she was diagnosed late as an adult, which has such a huge effect on confidence and self-esteem. I really hope that in the future, the diagnostic process for women and girls becomes less complex and more accessible. At 7 years old, Amie was diagnosed with epilepsy; she has an intense love for science, however her epilepsy has restricted her from working in hazardous environments like laboratories. When Amie’s seizures became more infrequent, she started her career as a pharmaceutical dispenser to fulfil her interest in science with the aim to complete her NVQ3 in the future. Amie’s story has inspired me so much; her tenacity and self assurance is something I admire greatly.
‘Hi, my name is Amie, I'm 34, and I am a late diagnosed Autistic female.
I first realised I was likely Autistic after seeing a documentary at the age of 11 or 12. After gaslighting from parents, teachers and Doctors (no you’re not, every kid feels different, it’s just a phase etc etc) I put it to the back of my mind and grudgingly accepted that no one would ever believe me.
It wasn’t until I was 17/18, when another documentary reignited my previous concerns and convinced me that there was no way that I could not be autistic. The more I researched it, the more determined I became to get the referral I deserved.
After numerous GP appointments, begging and pleading for an assessment, the closest I came to achieving my goal was one Doctor shrugging his shoulders and saying ‘yeah, you probably are’. I’ll never forget that.
I would have likely persevered trying for years (that’s just the kind of person I am) had it not been for a chance inheritance when I was 21. I decided enough is enough and started researching private assessors and found the Dilemma consultancy in Sheffield (now based in London).
Finally, I got my appointment. I was terrified. Was I now paying for yet another person to tell me that I was making it up? Sitting in that consultation room, I was made to feel completely at ease. It honestly felt like someone was listening to me for the first time in my life. We went through everything - my childhood, school life and my current life, nothing was left out. I completely broke down when Dr Tantum told me what I already knew to be true. I felt validated.
In 2009, my diagnosis of Autism, ADD and Generalised Anxiety disorder cost over £900.
I felt so much joy after my diagnosis, but I was probably slightly naïve. I had gone in there thinking if I just had a named condition on my medical record, maybe the NHS will finally support me and what I'd been through. But no, there was nothing. No support for adults unless you are a deemed a burden on society AKA high support needs AKA low functioning AKA severe autism.
Now, over 10 years later, I had hoped we had progressed in terms of accessibility to diagnosis through our beloved NHS.
How wrong I was.
Yesterday I was talking with a gentleman on Facebook, about the same age as me when I had my diagnosis. His story broke my heart. It was like de ja vu. It hurts so so much because I never want anybody to experience what I went through at school. I am in tears as I write this because it just feels like nothing has changed.
There is no support in this country for late diagnosed adults or high masking kids that slip through the net. It just feels like the NHS goes by the rule that if someone has made it this far in life without diagnosis then they have no reason to help.
The morality of ‘high or low functioning’ is still a big problem. In the eyes of our healthcare system, those deemed ‘low functioning’ have their autonomy taken away from them through over care and those deemed ‘high functioning’ are told that they do not require support at all. All of which is utterly ridiculous seeing as how one day an autistic person might be on top form and be perceived as ‘high functioning’, then crash when they get home and be unable to function at all. The opposite can be true of ‘low functioning’ individuals, where the majority of the time they may struggle, but the moment they have a chance to shine, their care could be retracted and may choose not to risk aiming too high. Autism daily life support should not be an ‘either or’, it should be there when we need it. It needs to take in to consideration that capability may fluctuate on a daily, or even hourly basis.
I’m lucky in some respects. I’m confident, outspoken and persistent. I have a strong sense of justice and when I know something is wrong, I’ll just come right out and say it – I hate all dimensions of injustice with a passion. It’s safe to say I talk about Autism A LOT. Education, awareness and acceptance are high on my agenda. However, I know many other Autistic people don’t have my combination of personality traits (no two autistic people are the same) and I fear too many undiagnosed kids and adults are just being swept under the rug.
That’s why I won’t stop talking about Autism, it’s not just about me.’ - Amie
Clara
I had such a great time meeting Clara and shooting with her; I see so much of myself as a teenager in her, and I felt like we really connected through our shared experiences. Her love of retro is shown through her effortlessly cool fashion sense; she’s definitely one of the most stylish people I have ever met!
‘At the age of 10, I found out that I had autism, and in a way, it changed my life, as I had more of an understanding about who I was. From a young age, I had a strong passion for animation, and I loved how characters would come to life and how a story was told through the characters.
When I was 11, I took an animation course at the Leeds collage of art two times, and I had such a great time as it was something that I was passionate about as well as talking to people who shared my passion.
Since I found out that I had autism, I have told people about it so that can understand more about who I am. As a person with autism, my brain works differently, and that’s why I think differently, and see things differently.
When I began high school, I was quite nervous because even though other people my age were around me, it was like being a small fish among other small fishes in a big pond. Even in high school, when I was at home, I had a group of dolls who I would talk to about my feelings, and I acted as if they were a family, and when I was 11, going through from primary to high school, that helped me a lot, as a person with autism.
It was during my first year at high school when I began to listen to music, something before which I hadn’t actually done much of before. Occasionally, I would listen to a film’s soundtrack, and songs from a film. When I was 12, on my birthday, I watched Moulin Rouge (2001), and the songs that were covered in that film, from artists such as Madonna and Elton John, gave me an interest in listening to music. Throughout when I was 12, I had developed a love for the music of the Beatles (especially the song ‘girl’ from the Rubber Soul album), Bjork, Sergio Mendes and Brasil 66, culture club and others. Now that I’m 15, I love the Velvet Underground, the Rolling Stones, the Beatles, T.Rex, Nico and many other artists.
Another one of my interests would have to be looking at photos from the 60s/70s, as I love seeing what all the rockstars and the mods wore. I enjoy looking at these photos as they inspire me. People who inspire me such as Edie Sedgwick, Marianne Faithful, Anita Pallenberg, Jane Birkin, Françoise Hardy, and some male icons such as John Lennon, Kieth Richards and David Bowie. Their style really inspires me because their style is different, and I really like that as I think it’s unique. I love listening to 60s/70s music as it inspires me with my thoughts.
At the end of the day, my autism is what makes me who I am. Sometimes it is quite hard to describe how it is to people, but as a person with autism, I’m proud of who I am, and that I’m different; remember, the whole world is filled with different people. Sometimes we may see things the same way, or have a completely different view.’ - Clara
Charlie came to my speech about the project at The Photography and Video Show at the NEC last month, so it seemed like a great time to photograph him for my project afterwards!
‘Since learning that I’m autistic, I have become more confident and accepting of myself. It has made me feel better knowing that I am allowing myself to stim. Being able to accept myself has helped, and is helping me still, as I can be myself more. Another reason why I am happy about being autistic is that I can advocate for autism on what, and how I experience/experienced life as a neuro-diverse person in a euro-typical world.
I have to be honest here, because this is what the project is about. Some days I feel like autism is amazing, and it helps when I hyper-focus on a task I’m doing. I love when I stim - happy or sad, because I’m finally expressing who I am. The other days, well it’s much harder due to the executive dysfunction. I hate that I can’t do the things I want to do. Those days make it hard to do a lot of stuff - even the stuff I love to do, like photography. I find this incredibly frustrating as I want to do it so bad, but can’t physically make myself do it, which makes me sad. But I would not change it for the world, the bad experiences, the good ones. I am me because of them, I’ve made mistakes, and have learnt and grown into who I am. I am proud of that and can only hope to become a better person with time and more life experiences!
I first figured our I had autism from relating to a lot of the instagram posts on autism my friend was posting to her story. I then researched autism online and followed a lot of autistic advocated instagram to look what they were posting to see if I related to what they had posted about autism and the experience they had been through themselves. Seeing as I did relate to a lot of the posts, I decided to tell my parents, they were very accepting of me saying I was autistic.
They then told me to call the doctors; I told my G.P about my ‘symptoms’. He then referred me to a psychologist. I am now on a waiting list to get diagnosed, but have self-diagnosed myself as I have thoroughly researched autism. I have read over my medical notes several times, and in secondary school I was tested for autism Unfortunately, CAMHS thought I wasn’t showing enough autistic traits. Another thing in my medical notes is that the word ‘complex; was repeated throughout, which I found hurt me because being called complex, in my mind, isn’t a good thing. It comes across as very negative.’ - Charlie
